Searching

I know I'm supposed to be helping people. Some people help monetarily, but I know in my heart I'm supposed to have a more hands on approach. This is what my job/career is meant to be. But the questions remain. What should I be doing? Where should I be? Where should I be going? How can I help people? How will I help people? I have the skills, the knowledge, the intuition and the desire... but which way do I go? I know that once I find the answers to these questions, so many other questions about my future will be answered. 

Direction

I can't remember where I was the other day when I heard a Michael W. Smith song. I initially began listening to the lyrics because I was surprised to hear the song being played in a secular establishment. But the words stuck with me. And they've continued to replay in my head each day since then. 

The wind is moving, but I am standing still

A life of pages, waiting to be filled

A heart that's hopeful, a heart that's full of dreams

But this becoming, is harder than it seems

I have so many talents and so much to give. It's just a struggle for me to figure out which way I need to go to fulfill my own dreams, while fulfilling the needs of others. I don't imagine that I am, or ever will be a 'nine-to-fiver'. Of course the answer isn't living in poverty, or running away to a small remote island either... although Tahiti does sound nice, doesn't it? 

Peace Corps?

I've been kicking this idea around in my brain for a while. I'm not exactly sure when I first requested an informational packet from the Peace Corps, but I know it was before I moved to Chicago. So, sometime prior to 2007.

A few months after moving to Chicago I went to my first information meeting with a coworker. Then a couple months later, I went on my own to another. By the end of 2007 I began filling out the online application. However, I still had some doubts about applying. 

Questions that I couldn't quite answer, or come to terms with, bounced around in my head. Can I handle the isolation of being a Peace Corps Volunteer? What about not dating anyone for 2 years? I'm getting older, do I want to postpone my romantic life for that long? I already got a late start in my career as a Landscape Architect, will a 2 year break ruin my chances of a reasonable retirement? Is joining the Peace Corps a cop-out on working and living in the real world?  

I've found answers to most of those questions. I'm not concerned about it hurting my dating, or career opportunities anymore. Fate will still follow me no matter where my life leads. It's also becoming more apparent that I want to run my own business and the Peace Corps experience can give me more experience, knowledge and confidence to help with this. So, it's not a cop-out on working/living in the real world at all. It is the real world. I'm so frustrated by how so many of us focus on our own success and blind ourselves to the realities of the rest of the world. I want time to consider the things that really matter and actually work and live in the real world. 

Now of course there are other questions... What if I get sent to Africa? A lot of heat and very little shade. Ugh! What about the isolation? Will I be able to complete the projects there that I need to? In this economy, will the application process be even more selective and can I even get accepted? 

I have a few other things to complete today, but maybe I'll restart that application soon.

3 Blogs 2 Many

I don't know if 3 blogs is too many, but I'm trying to keep my random thoughts, relating to different random topics, somewhat organized. I have 2 other blogs, although, I've only written in one of them. The other may, or may not receive it's first entry today. 

My most active blog follows my adventures in marathon training. Gabbi Runs

My other blog is supposed to follow my adventures as a designer. Designer At Large

And then there is this blog. A place where I can share my perspective on everything else in life. 

Me and the Icelandic Man

T + One

It's the beginning of a new year, so I've found a new way to keep in touch with people. Many of you may be familiar with my travelogues on the trekshare site, but this will hopefully provide me with an easier way to get my travel photos out to the masses. Check back occasionally and see what I've added.